No, no es una secuela de mi finísimo y congratulado ultimo post. Simplemente un día, mientras jugaba con el bonito Google Chromium en ingles, me di cuenta de que entre sus curiosidades tiene la opción de traducir (al ingles) lo que viene siendo la pagina web de tu preferencia. Esto lo descubrí mientras estaba de visita en el blog más popular de toda américa, lo que hizo que me diera cuenta de lo divertidas que pueden ser mis letras en el idioma de (inserte aquí el nombre de su británico favorito). Con unos pocos y simiescos remaches por parte de moi para no parecer tan genérico (realizadas nuevamente en horario no del todo propicio para mi caja sesera), este es el resultado:
There comes a time in the life of every no-teenager where you have to talk to your favorite sandy about dark and serious issues that could define the immediate future or even their lives for years to come:
-Myselfsin: ... and Mjolnir is the hammer of the mighty Thor with which he can summon storms. It was created by his father Odin with a mystic metal called ur, and is so heavy that only the noble-hearted can grab it... Are you paying attention?
-Sandy (snacking vegetables): uh-huh ...
-I: Well, I was sayin, was for centuries a wooden stick hidden in a cave, but when the Stone men came from Saturn, Dr. Donald Blake struck it against a rock, returning to normal. And it was thanks to him that Blake became Thor and beated the Hulk in their first meeting, and was because of that that could unite the original Avengers ...
-A: a-ha, ok, is it necessary to talk about this?
-Y: eh, I guess not
-A: then, can we talk about something else?
-Y: I think so, what you want to talk?
-A: your facebook profile picture
-Y: What?
-A: I do not like it
-Y: what's wrong with my profile pic ... but you choose it. In fact, you shoot it. along with 38 other peers.
-A: I know, but now I do not like it anymore.
-Y: good, if not for you my picture would be a picture of venom, so what do you suggest?
-A: your hand
-Y: "my hand? What happen my hand?
-A: it has bracelets
-Y: I know it has has bracelets, I put them there, so I like to call it "my hand"
-A: no stupid, we can take a picture of the bracelets of your hand. your bracelets defines you
-Y: I'm confused, I need an adult ...
-A: see (pointing to my right wrist with a jicama slice): you like heavy metal, study at UNAM, like comics, you said you're "rude"...
-Y: Hey!
-A: a member of the Legionaries of Christ, of CADO, the international Catholic Christian Apostolic Retrograde right-wing, beer and football lover, and besides you're a hipp ... wait a moment, why you have a hippie skull symbol? I assume that you hate the world
After that I began to think. I dont hate the world, only people. And not even that. I've realized that I really like to help and make people happy (although, on the other hand, I feel an irrational dislike for pregnant women and men with cowboy hat). I like to give lectures and classes (of course, as if it were day). I'm just one of 11,000 million guys who resent the way the world works (or how we did'it work).But unlike many people, I spend my spare time (something that ordinary people often called "weeks") in thinking that way, could solve everything. And, well, that's what I thought:
All You Need Is Love
1977 years ago (more or less) there was a super-carpenter, bearded fan of the wafers, fish and good wines, which nobody wanted because he liked to take the counter to all and talk like Cervantes's book character. The going rate for life preaching "peace and love", something very rare for a primitive and violent species as human. 1800 and many years later, a bunch of guys around the world (especially yankies) was trying to copied, including in the profile frecunte consumption of cannabis and other things. These boys thought the world would be a better place if all the love we felt. But love is not material or carnal love, but love to all: love for your country, your neighbor, your planet, your species, plants, animals, water, air, to earth, fire, thunder, sun, your family, your dog, everything. If all we felt that there would be total love illicitly enriched bankers up their pants, or drug lords run sending everyone who put it across, or scab Canadians playing gotcha with seals, or rulers squeezing people like oranges, or priests raping children (hell, not even have priests!). That's why at some point in life (early high school) believed fervently in the hippie idea. But, to be honest, who really looks like fun such a world?. We would live in a pink and peaceful planet for a while, but what then?. Then everything would be boring. Sorry, but the great plan of the hippies isn't perfect.
Seek and Destroy (or Kill 'em all, show no mercy!)
It was when entering high school that I realized (thanks to guys like these, and these, as well as theseand also those) that death and destruction could be more fun that all that peace and love stuff. With everything that happens in this world, people who think they can do what they please just because they have more money than everyone else, disposable thousands of soldiers being sent to his death just so that some guys can take Corvater advantage of the place they invade, chimpanzees dressed as police beating women, students, aboriginals, children and workers only because they got paid a bit more power than normal, morons who believe that if you look or think like them are a criminal or an envoy of the daemon, gangsters exploiting natural resources without the slightest regard, daily violations of human rights and animal ... Everything would be easier if everything were in black and white: if the Americans are invading countries for pleasure, as easy as going there and kill them all. But the world does not work well, 'cause not all is in black and white. We like to say "those evil Palestinians! misogynist fanatics, murderers of innocents," but nobody talks about the Israelites who practiced target shooting with them using that arsenal that is 3.768x10 ³ ³ times more destructive than a human bomb. We think, "those poor poor Indians, abused and discriminated against by all", maybe true, but it is also true that they are normal people who can be as good, bad, sexist and violent as anyone.They say human beings are inherently corrupt because not only did we kill each other, but also ended up with everything that is around us, may be true or not, but the truth is that since all (inevitably) born and raised in the same corrupted environment, Esam all destined to become corrupt lots of corrupt meat (some more than others). With the situation so bad, the easy thing to end it all and start over again before God does. Humanity is going through so many problems it is impossible to solve them all, so it's easier to follow anyone else suffering, it's all we die. Stopping every human being on this planet, to make sure anybody to suffer because of another human being, and incidentally, let nature take its course in peace. If your computer has too many virus, what are you doing? Format it.This is my way of thinking that leads people to believe that I am a misanthrope sociopath who hates and wants to kill everyone (and in part they are right). But the truth is that the take to the streets with a gun and shoot whoever you see is not going to solve anything (although it must be incredibly therapeutic.) The ideal would be to end all at once, without agony and suffering. The problem is to murder to 15,000 million people in a Blink is something slightly difficult to achieve (although I have some ideas). So, we go to plan C.
... And Justice For All
Ok, so far have not worked neither love, nor hate, how about justice?. Imagine a world like ours, but with one difference: an unavoidable justice. Want to commit a crime against your peers and not so similar? All right, below, you're wellcome, but then pay for it. The main problem of our world is impunity.Anyone with sufficient resources can make and unmake as he pleases without feeling any fear or receive any punishment when it's wrong. In theory this should be the work of God, but he is busy with other things. And as far as the presidents, kings, governors and annexes should also examine it (ah, forgot that they too are part of the problem) This solution (in my opinion) would be the most viable, if not for that is completely utopian and impractical ...
Awww, well ... I guess it's easier to wait for God and his new little earthquakes machine end up with us before someone else does.
C'est fini.
(This is what happens when it's 1:00 a.m. and gives you an attack of textual creativity suppressed for two months.)
-¡Y eso es todo en nuestro incompetente programa del día de hoy! Un post que es más del traductor de google que mío. Ok, para no hacerlo tan inocuo, les cuento que ahora que me puse a jugar con el señor gimp (la versión no-coporatimalvada de photoshop) los banners de este, su blog de confianza, ya no seran patrocinados por ninguna pagina de internet-editor de imagenes para dummies, sino que estaran hechos completamente por su servilleta, no importa cuanto tarden en salir. Este es un compromiso con todos y cada uno de ustedes, queridos ciudadanos. Gracias, gracias.
Adieu.
There comes a time in the life of every no-teenager where you have to talk to your favorite sandy about dark and serious issues that could define the immediate future or even their lives for years to come:
-Myselfsin: ... and Mjolnir is the hammer of the mighty Thor with which he can summon storms. It was created by his father Odin with a mystic metal called ur, and is so heavy that only the noble-hearted can grab it... Are you paying attention?
-Sandy (snacking vegetables): uh-huh ...
-I: Well, I was sayin, was for centuries a wooden stick hidden in a cave, but when the Stone men came from Saturn, Dr. Donald Blake struck it against a rock, returning to normal. And it was thanks to him that Blake became Thor and beated the Hulk in their first meeting, and was because of that that could unite the original Avengers ...
-A: a-ha, ok, is it necessary to talk about this?
-Y: eh, I guess not
-A: then, can we talk about something else?
-Y: I think so, what you want to talk?
-A: your facebook profile picture
-Y: What?
-A: I do not like it
-Y: what's wrong with my profile pic ... but you choose it. In fact, you shoot it. along with 38 other peers.
-A: I know, but now I do not like it anymore.
-Y: good, if not for you my picture would be a picture of venom, so what do you suggest?
-A: your hand
-Y: "my hand? What happen my hand?
-A: it has bracelets
-Y: I know it has has bracelets, I put them there, so I like to call it "my hand"
-A: no stupid, we can take a picture of the bracelets of your hand. your bracelets defines you
-Y: I'm confused, I need an adult ...
-A: see (pointing to my right wrist with a jicama slice): you like heavy metal, study at UNAM, like comics, you said you're "rude"...
-Y: Hey!
-A: a member of the Legionaries of Christ, of CADO, the international Catholic Christian Apostolic Retrograde right-wing, beer and football lover, and besides you're a hipp ... wait a moment, why you have a hippie skull symbol? I assume that you hate the world
After that I began to think. I dont hate the world, only people. And not even that. I've realized that I really like to help and make people happy (although, on the other hand, I feel an irrational dislike for pregnant women and men with cowboy hat). I like to give lectures and classes (of course, as if it were day). I'm just one of 11,000 million guys who resent the way the world works (or how we did'it work).But unlike many people, I spend my spare time (something that ordinary people often called "weeks") in thinking that way, could solve everything. And, well, that's what I thought:
All You Need Is Love
1977 years ago (more or less) there was a super-carpenter, bearded fan of the wafers, fish and good wines, which nobody wanted because he liked to take the counter to all and talk like Cervantes's book character. The going rate for life preaching "peace and love", something very rare for a primitive and violent species as human. 1800 and many years later, a bunch of guys around the world (especially yankies) was trying to copied, including in the profile frecunte consumption of cannabis and other things. These boys thought the world would be a better place if all the love we felt. But love is not material or carnal love, but love to all: love for your country, your neighbor, your planet, your species, plants, animals, water, air, to earth, fire, thunder, sun, your family, your dog, everything. If all we felt that there would be total love illicitly enriched bankers up their pants, or drug lords run sending everyone who put it across, or scab Canadians playing gotcha with seals, or rulers squeezing people like oranges, or priests raping children (hell, not even have priests!). That's why at some point in life (early high school) believed fervently in the hippie idea. But, to be honest, who really looks like fun such a world?. We would live in a pink and peaceful planet for a while, but what then?. Then everything would be boring. Sorry, but the great plan of the hippies isn't perfect.
Seek and Destroy (or Kill 'em all, show no mercy!)
It was when entering high school that I realized (thanks to guys like these, and these, as well as theseand also those) that death and destruction could be more fun that all that peace and love stuff. With everything that happens in this world, people who think they can do what they please just because they have more money than everyone else, disposable thousands of soldiers being sent to his death just so that some guys can take Corvater advantage of the place they invade, chimpanzees dressed as police beating women, students, aboriginals, children and workers only because they got paid a bit more power than normal, morons who believe that if you look or think like them are a criminal or an envoy of the daemon, gangsters exploiting natural resources without the slightest regard, daily violations of human rights and animal ... Everything would be easier if everything were in black and white: if the Americans are invading countries for pleasure, as easy as going there and kill them all. But the world does not work well, 'cause not all is in black and white. We like to say "those evil Palestinians! misogynist fanatics, murderers of innocents," but nobody talks about the Israelites who practiced target shooting with them using that arsenal that is 3.768x10 ³ ³ times more destructive than a human bomb. We think, "those poor poor Indians, abused and discriminated against by all", maybe true, but it is also true that they are normal people who can be as good, bad, sexist and violent as anyone.They say human beings are inherently corrupt because not only did we kill each other, but also ended up with everything that is around us, may be true or not, but the truth is that since all (inevitably) born and raised in the same corrupted environment, Esam all destined to become corrupt lots of corrupt meat (some more than others). With the situation so bad, the easy thing to end it all and start over again before God does. Humanity is going through so many problems it is impossible to solve them all, so it's easier to follow anyone else suffering, it's all we die. Stopping every human being on this planet, to make sure anybody to suffer because of another human being, and incidentally, let nature take its course in peace. If your computer has too many virus, what are you doing? Format it.This is my way of thinking that leads people to believe that I am a misanthrope sociopath who hates and wants to kill everyone (and in part they are right). But the truth is that the take to the streets with a gun and shoot whoever you see is not going to solve anything (although it must be incredibly therapeutic.) The ideal would be to end all at once, without agony and suffering. The problem is to murder to 15,000 million people in a Blink is something slightly difficult to achieve (although I have some ideas). So, we go to plan C.
... And Justice For All
Ok, so far have not worked neither love, nor hate, how about justice?. Imagine a world like ours, but with one difference: an unavoidable justice. Want to commit a crime against your peers and not so similar? All right, below, you're wellcome, but then pay for it. The main problem of our world is impunity.Anyone with sufficient resources can make and unmake as he pleases without feeling any fear or receive any punishment when it's wrong. In theory this should be the work of God, but he is busy with other things. And as far as the presidents, kings, governors and annexes should also examine it (ah, forgot that they too are part of the problem) This solution (in my opinion) would be the most viable, if not for that is completely utopian and impractical ...
Awww, well ... I guess it's easier to wait for God and his new little earthquakes machine end up with us before someone else does.
C'est fini.
(This is what happens when it's 1:00 a.m. and gives you an attack of textual creativity suppressed for two months.)
-¡Y eso es todo en nuestro incompetente programa del día de hoy! Un post que es más del traductor de google que mío. Ok, para no hacerlo tan inocuo, les cuento que ahora que me puse a jugar con el señor gimp (la versión no-coporatimalvada de photoshop) los banners de este, su blog de confianza, ya no seran patrocinados por ninguna pagina de internet-editor de imagenes para dummies, sino que estaran hechos completamente por su servilleta, no importa cuanto tarden en salir. Este es un compromiso con todos y cada uno de ustedes, queridos ciudadanos. Gracias, gracias.
Adieu.
2 comentarios:
That's madness!!!
THAT'S SPARTAAAA!
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